at my biggest

at my biggest
christmas 2005

Saturday 29 December 2012

Getting Closer to 2013

As l get closer to 2013, l feel like l am moving further away from my goals. I was always told that my thirties would be the busiest time of my life, but that is a large understatement. Weeks feel like days, semesters feel like weeks. I blink and time has passed me by. I am torn in so many directions, work, study, children, family, and then there is me. Trying to find time for me, without feeling like l am missing out on time better spent else where.

I have managed to keep up my fitness by squeezing in 5 min workouts in the morning and evening, and have just recently purchased myself a bike so love riding my bike with my boys, talking and playing with them. It's my food that continues to hold me back. I eat for the sake of eating, which drives me crazy. I avoid mirrors and certain clothing because l know they will give me the honest truth l am trying to avoid, which is l have let the food win again.

So today is another change to get it right. I need to get my eating back on track and stop avoiding the truth that l have gained far too much weight back, and it is not healthy. So l am going to try to find the time, along with everything else that l do, to make myself aware of what l am putting in my mouth. Writing this blog helps keep me aware and present, as l can not hide from the mirror any longer, if l do l will end up back where l was in 2005 by the end of 2013, which was over 100 kilos, unfit and unhappy. Now to unlock the energy l know l feel when l kick up the exercise and clean up the diet and use this to help me complete my crazy schedule  so when l do hit my forties and get to slow things down, l will have a body that is healthy and can enjoy this time.

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